The Ultimate Decency of Things

To learn the way it is important to be sharp and inconspicuous.  When you are sharp, you are not confused by people.  When you are inconspicuous, you do not contend with people.  Not being confused by people, you are empty and spiritual.  Not contending with people, you are serene and subtle. - Lio-An in the Zen Calendar (May 21, 2006).

True words aren't eloquent;
eloquent words aren't true.
Wise men don't need to prove their point;
men who need to prove their point aren't wise. - Lao-Tzu in the Zen Calendar (May 17, 2003).

Every morning, our first thought should be a wish to devote the day to the good of all living beings. - Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoche in the Zen Calendar (October 19, 2006).

I believe in an ultimate decency of things. - Robert Louis Stevenson in the Zen Calendar (November 26, 2002).

Day 336.  Yes, I am opening with more quotes these days.  Yes, this is influenced by the rapidly declining number of blog days remaining in proportion to my stack of saved Zen Calendar pages. Yes (unabashedly!) my OCD brain sector derives immense pleasure from the task of selecting and "grouping" appropriate quotes for a particular blog.  On the whole, it seems like a more productive channel for my obsessive tendencies than folding the infinite layers of discarded clothes on my son's bed.

Today I opened an e-mail from a friend who had forwarded a powerful YouTube excerpt from an Eve Ensler lecture in Oxford, England (take a look if you'd like - I found it by doing a YouTube search on "Eve Ensler security talk" because the forwarded one was in French).  She opened by saying, "I know some of you will be disappointed and some of you will be greatly relieved when I tell you I will not be talking about vaginas tonight."  In case you are not familiar with Ensler, she is the playwright who wrote "The Vagina Monologues."  She also started "V-Day" - a day of international awareness and activity aimed at ending violence against women.

I won't spend time summarizing the content of the talk, though I would highly recommend viewing it on YouTube.  Obviously, the content was powerful and meaningful to me, but what seemed most blogworthy was to comment on Ensler's demeanor and presence during the talk. She was a moving and efficacious Bodhisattva.

It was evident that her speech was carefully prepared; she held it in her lap and referenced it frequently.  I imagine her audience was primarily comprised of educated individuals who exerted personal time and expense to attend the lecture in Oxford.  The delivery was precise and practiced without being rigid and monotonous.  Ensler's speech is eloquent and measured - it seems as though she reflects on what she is saying as she speaks, and is invested in expressing herself thoughtfully.  She doesn't get in a hurry.  Her body language epitomized "calm, assertive energy" - relaxed, moderately animated, fluid, open, non-defensive.  There was a marked absence of exaggerated gesticulation and labile voice inflection.

Ensler included numerous concrete and specific examples of personal life experiences that contributed to the credibility of what she was sharing.  She didn't have to exaggerate or dramatize the material she conveyed.  It felt like I was being talked "with," not "to."  Her opinions and beliefs were unquestionably clear, but it never felt like I had to believe exactly as she did.  As a listener, I felt respected and acknowledged.  It seemed like she would be open to dialogue, and interested in what members of her audience felt and thought.  There was mental and psychological "room" in her speech - room for input and reflection, adjustment and growth.

I was acutely aware of my feeling state as I listened to the clip.  Like the dogs in Cesar Milan's "pack," I was calmed by Ensler's presence.  I paid attention, and absorbed much of her lecture in exquisite detail.  Some new neuropathways started firing as neophyte thoughts and questions vied for brain space.  My mind and heart were stimulated and encouraged.  It occurred to me how stunningly different this felt when I compared it to my reactions when I listen to the angry tirades that also find their way to YouTube and most major broadcasting networks.  Angry speakers seem to get a lot of air time.  A lot.  Apparently, there are many people who voluntarily seek out and pay attention to angry, gesticulating, dramatic speakers.  Who equate that speaking style with authority, knowledge, and credibility.  Who believe that if someone is mad enough, and talks loud enough, they must be right.

The psychologist in me got curious about the segment of the population that reinforces and rewards angry, aggressive public speakers.  I arrived at several hypotheses, but want to research the subject a little further.  The point for the blog is this:  I am going to consciously seek out people who speak with calm, assertive energy.  I want to listen to contemplative, reasoned speech that strikes a sane balance between thought and emotion.  I will watch for the inclusion of primary sources from which information is derived, and see if those sources are articulated in a manner that enables me to find them myself so that I can formulate my own opinions and conclusions.  I'm going to devote energy to listening to people who seem open to dialogue, who respect and welcome different views, who are non-defensive, objective about what they do and do not know, and are desirous of growth and change.

When I speak, I'm going to emulate the qualities I admired in Eve Ensler. I want to learn the rare, beautiful art of modulating my passion with a delivery style that increases the chance that important points will be heard and considered by others.  I bet the Buddha spoke that way.  Most importantly, I am going to apply those skills specifically to challenging the angry, aggressive, fearful, authoritarian style of speech that, unfortunately, seems to be gaining a lot of momentum, attention, and press time in our country.  Of course, the challenge will be to voice my challenge with calm, assertive energy.  I really want to contribute to the ultimate decency of things.

Gassho,
CycleBuddhaDoc