Gracious Receiving

Gratitude!
Tears melting into
mountain snow. - Soen Nakagawa in the Zen Calendar (January 31, 2002).

Day 308. The eve of Bodhi Day, also called (in Zen Buddhism) Rohatsu, which is Japanese for the Eighth Day of the Twelfth Month. December 8th. Tomorrow. A most sacred Buddhist holiday. The day Buddha's Enlightenment is observed. The day Siddartha sat under the Pipul tree and discovered some mildly significant Buddhist concepts including Karma, the Eightfold Path, and the Four Noble Truths. I will be doing some extra sitting, drinking some extra tea, and chanting some extra chants. Just the right amount of each.

Recently, I spoke to many clients, across several contexts, about learning to be gracious receivers. I coined the term myself during a session as I explained the paradox of when we receive something offered by someone else with grace and gratitude we are actually giving a gift of our own. It feels good when our gifts are graciously received. It is easy to recognize graciousness in the act of giving; less common to emphasize grace in receiving. I believe that is because there is a distinct vulnerability in the act of receiving. To some degree, giving also contains some vulnerability (will our gift be rejected, exchanged, forgotten about, neglected, minimized, criticized?), but the bottom line is that we can rest solidly in the altruism intrinsic to being a giver. In contrast, we may be in the position of receiver precisely because we have a need, a lack, a shortage, vulnerability, handicap, or weakness.

This is a long blog, and I have been interrupted. Come back to it. There is much more to say.

Gassho,
CycleBuddhaDoc