False Flats

There is no reality except the one contained within us. That is why so many people live such an unreal life. They take the images outside them for reality and never let the world within assert itself. - Hermann Hesse in the Zen Calendar (March 6, 2003).

Day 238. I am glad that my practice is strengthening as the year goes on because sometimes allocating portions of every single evening to blogging and sitting is arduous indeed. The need to express this perception continues to diminish with time. It is what it is. Keep washing the cup.

On one of my training DVD's, Chris Carmichael refers to something called a "false flat." For the longest time, I couldn't figure out what he meant. During last Saturday's ride, it finally clicked, and a blog was born. A false flat is a section of road that, to the eye, appears to be a flat, even surface. However, the experience of actually traversing it on a bicycle provides evidence to the contrary. Depending on which direction you are moving, your body begins to emit signals indicative of sloping terrain. If you are pedaling in the downhill direction, speed picks up disproportionately to your perceived exertion, the jubilant "I love my bike" feeling wells up, and you temporarily benefit from the delusion of being an amazingly strong and fit cyclist. If moving in the uphill direction, confusion sets in as your heart beats curiously fast, your legs feel strained, and speed declines. You start wondering if you are sick, or fatigued, or not fully recovered from yesterday's ride. Either way, bodily sensation temporarily contradicts what visual input is telling you. In actuality, the seemingly flat section is a subtle and usually lengthy incline or decline - i.e. a false flat.

This experiential comprehension of the definition of "false flats" made me think of some parallels in my clinical work. Frequently, clients erroneously perceive that their life is proceeding along on even ground. This usually occurs in the absence of flagrant peaks and valleys like births, deaths, marriage, divorce, breakups, work lay-offs, moves, etc. Yet sometimes in the midst of these seemingly benign periods, the body and the psyche begin to emit signals that all is not well. The person may become physically ill, and/or the psyche indicates something is wrong through anxiety, depression, compulsiveness, or self destructive behavior. This is confusing and demoralizing for clients because they feel their symptoms are illegitimate and/or their emotional response is excessive. Their erroneous conclusion is that they are flawed and defective.

I am going to begin using "false flats" as a metaphor when helping clients make sense of the symptoms that bring them to me. It is true that I see clients with easily identifiable stressors, traumas, and transitions. The psychobabble term for the accompanying anxiety, depression, and/or behavior difficulty is "Adjustment Disorder." Prognosis is favorable, and treatment is generally short term. In the past few years, however, clients increasingly present with vague complaints that less readily lend themselves to a simplistic understanding of their cause. They believe they are pedaling on even ground. But when we look closely, we see that the even ground is actually a false flat. And it is usually sloping upward.

My hunch is that most of existence in these "modern times" is like riding across an incredibly long false flat. Visible culture contributes to the delusion that happiness is effortlessly attainable, and suffering is an affliction of the past. We buy into the illusion that our impressive technology and affluence makes life easier and better. Yet why am I so tired? Disenchanted? Disconnected? Hopeless? Burdened with a nagging sense of futility? It gets confusing. Like the befuddlement that arises when my legs become weak and shaky while pedaling along a street my eyes view as flat. I can't quite figure out what is making me hurt.

Zazen eliminates false flats. When focused and empty, I am able to accurately receive the reliable data my senses provide. That includes my psychological, emotional, relational and ethical senses as well as my physical senses. When there is a consensus across several modalities, I interpret the signal as truth. If I feel exhausted, disheartened, irritable, depressed, and lethargic, I am not pedaling on flat ground, no matter how level it outwardly appears. When I trust my sensory input, I can use the data to adjust accordingly. Usually, it means I need to pedal slower, ease up, grab a draft, or get off the bike entirely (I was speaking metaphorically, but this is also literally true). If the false flat happens to be sloping in the downward direction, usually no adjustment is needed; I just hang on tight and enjoy the ride!

Watch for false flats. Don't take the images outside for reality. Let the world within assert itself. That is where our truth lies.

Gassho,
CycleBuddhaDoc